Public Enemy No.1’s Guide On How To Travel – Brendon Luke

(Reviewed by Heidi A. Swan)

Reading this book made feel like I was getting caught up with an old friend who also happens to be an irrepressible comedian.

Is it fine writing? No.

Did his extensive travels teach him compassion for humanity? No.

Does it inspire me to travel? Maybe…but not with the author. That would be like being an unwilling cast member of “The Hangover-Part IV”.

The book is comprised of a series of vignettes which chronicle his travels (and those of some of his family). There are stories of wild antics, relationships gone bad and simply his love of new experiences…all told through Luke’s biting and self-effacing wit.

Here are some samples.

“At the time Mother had hair down to her bum. It was thick and glorious…The Asian girl sat near them on the bus, and she would follow Mother into the shower with scissors, trying to get a piece of the magic hair. Mum says she was harmless, but it sounds a bit lesbo to me. Maybe this was a lesbian affair that should have happened, maybe I am ¼ Asian. I say that a lot, just for shits and giggles.”

“Except it turned out dinner was a bitch too…If you are only prepared to eat burgers why the fuck did you go to Bali? We were surrounded with dirt cheap, fabulous Indonesian food options, so why the fuck would I pay $20 for a mediocre burger?”

“We landed on the runway which wasn’t very long, on that note, neither was The Island…they had the one resort, two shitty restaurants, and no corner shop to buy anything fucking useful at any point of time. “

“We pulled up at Callum’s and the lights were blaring into the front room. This was Maureen and Callum’s Dads’ room. I bet she picked that room, so she could always hear Callum entering or leaving, so she could fucking spy on him. As soon as I had turned the engine off, the front door flew open. Maureen dramatically pushed the husband and daughter out of the way and came billowing out like a naked giraffe. “

If this sounds intriguing, here are some things to consider:

There are technical errors. There are some distasteful scenes: crude gay self-exploration and a woman getting casually slapped by a friend are two such examples. Most significantly, there is a lot of drinking and drugs.

I, myself, am a passionate voice in the drug prevention community. Luke tells of buying black market Valium in Bali which I found alarming (people die from it, especially when it’s combined with alcohol and a swimming pool. as it is in this story). Luke mentions in passing he has issues with depression and anxiety; it made me wonder if he’s aware drug and alcohol abuse negatively affect mental health.

That said, 80% of the time I was able to let all that go. This is because Luke is a vivacious storyteller with a breezy prose. His personality is so big in his writing I could see his expressions and hear his vocal inflections. In the dark days of COVID 19, it was fun just to let someone make me laugh.

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